Grandma- Once upon a time there was a boy, he was so alone, he used to walk in the side of the river tisza looking for little kuki breads to feed the ducks!
Boy- But why in a river, why dint he go to a store to buy the bread.
Grandma-He did not had any money my dear boy thats why he was in the side of the Tisza looking for little kuki breads to feed the ducks.
Boy- Did he had no money! well maybe his grandma was as greedy as you, and did not give him any money, thats why he was living in the missery!
Grandma-I did not say he was living in the missery!! he was not poor! I just said he was walking in the side of the Tisza looking for littl kuki breads to feed the ducks!! Now let me continue the story.
One day while he was walking there his eyes saw the most beautyful creature that they will ever see.
Boy- Bahhhh!! dont tell me it was a girl!! because then, its for sure that the story will be so boring and I have better things to do instead of listening to a boring old lady!
Grandma- (you f°°°) ehem as a matter of fact, It was!!! a girl!!! and he did fell in love with here and he did tried to gain her heart and you will stay here!! because I know that if you dont stay under this f(O.O)ng room you will go outside and spend all the money I gave you on drugs!! So let me finish the f#%!ng story!! ... ehem...
.... so (my dear grandson) he saw that beatyful girl, and then he started following her! but when the girl turned back and saw him, he got so scared that he jumped in to the bushes and the tried not to be seen.
Boy-What a pussy!!
Grandma- Shut the f#$& up now my lovely child. The girl saw him jump to the bushes and she was so curious that she approached. And they met... and that is the begining of a lovely story of ehem... love!
Boy- ...
Grandma- Dont look at me like that its not like I enjoy being with you just to keep you inside the house. I am a victim of this!! just because your f$%&ng parents cant control you!! But anyways my dear. This story is of your grandpa and I! and before he died (wildly devoured by street dogs in North Korea) he gave a diary to me with this story. And now I give it to you, my baby, as my legacy. Here!! Take It!!
Boy- Ok, let me see (turning pages) grandma, what dos fonti means?
Grandma- Give that f%$&ng thing to me!!- ehem I mean I will have to edit some pages before I give it to you. Now please get me a drink from the refrigerator and then disapear your ass from here!
Boy- Finally, now I can go with my friends.
Grandma- Yes you can!! And get your self lost in drugs, sex and alcohol!! thats all you do.
Boy- But grandma, im in the nursery.
Grandma- Nursery my f#$%ng #%& those things just teach you to smoke "The Weed" I remember in my nursery days, when the winter arrived and the....
Boy- (Jesus Christ there she goes again, you know what maybe Ill put something in her oxigen now)
Grandma- ... and then I used to skate in the Ice, and it was so nice because/ where is my f"#$%ng drink!!! i told you to go to the f#$%&ng kitchen and get me a F$%&#ng drink!!/ and yes it was so nice to skate, those were really nice days before the kids like you in the kinder garden smoked "The Weed" and its so...
Boy-(God?Budha?Allah? who ever you are out there, why dont you take her away from me now? or at least kill me?? I will die happy now, but let me scape!)
Grandma-yes and the neighborhood was so nice before......
-Gun shot-
The lesson we learned- thats why we should both die devoured by street dogs in North Korea at least it will be more romantic...
I love you so much baby. YOU ARE MY LIGHT!
